Questionability (English version)
by Aizawa Minami
Summary: Summary: Kirika begins with the evaluation, which calls to question her mindset.


A/N: Been a while, right? I know...but hey, here is another one. Not sure if it is good, but something I wrote in and an idea in another language, this is the English translated version. The original version is entitled, _Vitatható._ In which you can find it on my profile as soon as it is posted. Until then, enjoy this piece. :)

* * *

**_Questionability_**

Summary: Kirika begins with the evaluation, which calls to question her mindset.

Who is the murderer? Myself? Yes ... I am a murderer. I did it all myself. What impressed me was the power; the power that is strong enough to wash the sinners away from innocent children. And yet ... I see myself in the mirror ... I'm no different than any other man. I too, am sinful—but a discreet one amongst the innocent.  
And what did I do then? I hold on for dear life hoping that ... I could be saved – or perhaps I did not really care at the time. I just cared about Althena's instructions and what she wants.  
I was hanging around – very much like a puppet to Mistress Athena. Puppetry seems to be a skill to her; manipulative as she was, and still is ... pulling the strings until they moved for me to fall down like a slave – making my muscles twitch ...  
* Twitch, twitch ... TWITCH! *  
**_Ach…!_**  
"So, what did you do then?" Psychologists asked. They expect to get answers from me –to have a sense of self-satisfaction from helping a deranged, troubled patient. And what do you want from me? I sit for a few minutes ... did not say a damn word. Inside this little monster in me; was giggling, grinning, laughing madly at his own blatant stupidity. In my mind, I wanted to say, "What I did, then? I liked it. I liked the idea of being submissive to the female guardian. Who is almost like a mother to me—brought me in her home when I was near Death's hands ... I should have bloody grateful ... And I am. With her superiority hovering over me…is it unhealthy?"  
This psychologist looks at me shocked with my ranting, glaring. He set up his glasses and said, "Yes, yes it is." I looked at him coldly. "Suppose ... that's close enough to sent me to the asylum?"  
"Maybe. The condition you have with your surrogate mother is quite unhealthy ..."  
My expression turns angry little. "You're going to say that its incestuous, right? ... What kind of sick thinking ... I may devote myself Althena ... but it's not like that!"  
His expression becomes questionable, "Oh, why make it sound sadistic?"  
I laughed half-heartedly, "My relationship with Mistress Althena… if it sounds exactly like that ... weird to some and repulsive to some, I am the key to salvation –... Prophecy."  
"But why ...?"  
I retorted: "... She loves me like a second child, but a special one. I do not know why—but I 'sinned'—was corrupted before I met her. For her, I am portrayed as perfect."  
"You want more answers? I love her. Is it incestuous? No. But like a child that loves her mother."  
"I see ... And what about the other questions?"  
_He wants more ...?_  
I crossed my arms and legs, appearing annoyed.  
"Now, really, why?"  
"Then why are you here?"  
I stopped. My mouth twitches.  
"I do not know why ..."  
And this psychologist frowned, and then dissatisfied. "Find out for yourself of why you came here. We'll begin the next session in a few weeks."  
I did not say anything very different, just staring at the red carpet with my hands clutching my brown robe. I did not nod, either. I submitted, no questions asked. "Alright."  
"Good. Then I'll see about it."

* * *

I closed the door behind me, taking a deep breath to calm down. I thought about what I have just said – if it sounds right or not ... _... Maybe ... I know too much of what we do, and how I feel about it, Althena._ I look at my own flesh and blood – it seems to be a worthless fuck—the hatred, it's understandable that someone would hate me for who I am – that kills blindly without a mind of their own, or humanity. But what I could ever want from the start that I would like all the wicked (sinners) to die, and die in the hands of myself ...  
_So far, that's all I want in the world—I want a better peace for the world, Althena…_  
"Kirika, are you all right? Can you open the door, please?"

"Who is it?" The voice said. "It' me, Chloe."  
I hesitated at first. Not sure of her intentions. "What do you want?" I asked. "I am worried about you. Please let me in, I am your friend – you know me."  
I smiled a little inside. Just a little ... This one would not hurt me.  
"I'll let you in." I said.  
"Thank you, thank you," the voice said with gratitude. I opened the door and out came this girl with dark-black hair. She is smaller than me; four inches smaller – but she pulled the whole difference between a smile and a hug.  
This young girl has at least a little comfort and reassurance to her side. Not conflicting; despite not being able to understand the situation, I am in. She is young and naïve, compared to me and my maturity and solitude, but never mind to all – we're fine, very fine, as far as the prophecy goes. "What do you want to do, Kirika?" She asked, still in a comfortable embrace – my hand stroked her hair.  
"I do not know much, really."  
She looks up at me, smiling broadly, "I know. Want to read Alice in Wonderland?"  
"Again?"  
"Sure, why not? Much better than reading Noir, I want to do something that you're comfortable with; for a change."  
I chuckled, "I have a smile, you know?"  
"Ahh ... but come on, do you want to read fairytales with me, again?"  
"Of course ... I want to. 'Cause I would like that..."  
She smiled, giggling; "I know you do."


End file.
